I'm a Mutli-blogger

So I am now a writer on another blog. I feel the need to share this with you guys because I won't be double posting my stuff. So to check on my new blog, The Game, a sports related feed where I dissect happenings in the wide world of athletics, go to Hustler of the Weak and check it out.

The site also contains blogs by several other people and if you enjoy my work, you'll enjoy theirs as well. For other stuff related to HOTW and its creator, check out BkJaxon and enjoy the content!

~Ian

Row, row, row your boat...

SO i found out the date of my departure from Corpus Christi, TX to begin my journey to my new home port in Norfolk, VA. June 11. On that day, they will finally take the boy out of Texas... but will never pry Texas out of the boy.

Sure I've lived outside of Texas to go to school, but hell I could come home every once in a while. When I move to Norfolk, it will be more than a hop, skip and a jump. It will be more like a flying leap, or at least a very long drive.

Do not get me wrong, I am very excited to get to go somewhere different. I did join the Navy to go places, so being back in Texas, while nice and very accessible to family and friends, is not what I was planning. So moving to the largest Navy base in the world seems like a good adventure. I hear good and bad things about it, but I plan to make my own judgments.

So anyways, I will be shipping off for there in around 3 months, which means I better enjoy my last few months in this area. I hope to spend time with my sister in about a month (car willing) and maybe time with my friends who will be down here for Spring Break. I just have to get time off from work, which at this stage, seems mostly unlikely (except for a week in April for which I already have a leave chit).

Work has been.... WORK. Let's just say busy is an understatement. Long hours, and late nights are the everyday norm around my life, and days off are a rarity. We have a detachment leaving soon, so preparation for that has been hectic, and getting things to work, even more so. Hopefully, once they leave, things will slow down a little bit and we won't be running around like a group of headless chickens. Maybe.

So anyways that's my Navy life as of late... just work and more work, with an extra helping of work. Oh and a side of work to go with my work. Oh please hold the sleep and social life... I don't need any of that. Just sprinkle on a little extra work instead.

~Ian

Wishing

I wish I had a day off.

I wish I enjoyed my job more.

I wish I was more tolerant of others.

I wish I could understand people better.

I wish I understood myself better.

I wish I could be myself without fear of people judging me.

I wish I could not care what other people think.

I wish I cared about other people more.

I wish I didn't fence myself off.

I wish I didn't pour everything into those around me, and leave myself so vulnerable.

I wish I wasn't afraid.

I wish I wasn't so alone.

I wish I knew what I wanted to do with my life.

I wish I was happy with where I'm at, and stop looking for greener pastures.

I wish I could smile and feel like it was real.

I wish my heart wasn't so mangled.

I wish my mind wasn't so twisted.

I wish I was happy.

I wish I was inspired.

I wish I was driven.

I wish I could feel like I was making a difference.

I wish I could see the good things in myself and not all the bad.

I wish I could stop feeling like I'm whining.

I wish I could have an original thought.

I wish I could see my family.

I wish I could see my friends.

I wish I could live one of those movie lives.

I wish I could be like all of those heroes I read about.

I wish I could be honest with you.

I wish you could be honest with me.

I wish...

For Fucks Sake... What were they thinking?

Ok, so my day didn't start so well. My car failed to start before work. No biggie, change the battery, all is well. I got a ride to work, and had roving watch from 8 to 4. I work nights so the different schedule threw me a little out of whack, but I got over it.

It was a pretty pointless and boring watch, and I figured it was just a whatever kind of day. So I get off watch, and check to see what kind of battery I need. I pop the hood... I can't find the battery. I know I am not mechanically stupid, and I'm no genius at it either, but I usually have no issue finding the battery in a car. So i look and I look, then I remember an episode of Mythbusters where they are working on a Dodge Intrepid, and remember them saying something about removing the tire to get to the battery. So I look near the passenger side tire, and under the air filter and there it was. COMPLETELY FUCKING INACCESSIBLE from above. You have to take off the wheel and remove an access panel to get to the battery. WTF? Pain in the ass.

So me being the genius I am, I didn't really pay attention to the sizes of the bolts, because I figured I could just buy a tool kit and I would be good to go. So I get a ride to get a battery and the place we get the battery has shit for tool kits. The only one they have with anything resembling what I might need was $250 and the salesman said all I would need was a 7/16 and a 5/16 wrench. He said he had replaced one before and it was a piece of cake. So i get the stuff, go back to my car and start trying to work.

I get the car jacked up, the tire off and look at the bolts..... both of the new wrenches I have don't fit. FUCK. So I ask around and find a socket set... that fits the bolts on the mount and battery but not to the access panel. Not only that but the space to actually crank out the bolts is tiny so it takes FOREVER. So I find a pair of vice grips and manage to get the bolts out of the access panel, and wrench it out because it doesn't just pop out... no... you have to finagle and torque and twist... FFS! So I start taking off the top mount bracket, and one of the bolts is just so that when you twist the socket, you touch the battery terminal and gr0und it so you get sparks and shocked. So I shocked myself like 12 times and finally got the bolt out, old battery out, and new battery in, proceeding to shock myself about 12 more times putting the mount bracket back in.

I finally got everything back in and together, and the car starts and runs fine now. After an hour or so of fighting with the stupidest battery set up ever. I was so worn out from the frustration, effort, and ordeal. I really think that some people don't really think out how they design things and some shit isn't supposed to be so fucking difficult. I mean would you want to remove a circuit board to get at your tv remote batteries? Or do you think they should be right under a nice accessible door? People really should think stuff like this out when they design things. Oh well... I hope it will be a long while until i have to deal with that again... and at that point I will be ready!

So how was YOUR day?

~Ian

Drifter

This is the prologue to my new story. Tell me what you think.

On July 9, 2012, 95 percent of the population died. In less than one month, nearly 7 billion people were wiped out. Whether it was pestilence, nuclear bombs and their fallout, or the war in general, life on Earth was totally and utterly altered.

Those of us who survived, were left to make an existence out of nothing. We had a world raped of its resources, demolished by its wars, and pillaged by its people. Maybe it was better to have died, then to have lived.

Communities began to come together, and for a while things looked up. Unfortunately, human nature soon took over and the lesser side of humanity showed itself again. The communities became as dangerous as the open unprotected lands.

Some people chose to brave these open lands, moving from place to place, either alone or in small groups. These people were known as drifters. One drifter wanted nothing but to be left alone, but the world needed more of him. The people are in need of a hero, and the most unlikely person has to rise to the challenge. This is his story.

I would love some constructive criticism on the premise, and I would love to hear ideas and suggestions.

~Ian

24 and counting....

Another Valentine's Day alone.

*shrug*

24 in a big fat row. I'm implied and led to think I should feel bad about it. I should feel unloved, unhappy, and feel like something is missing.

Fuck that.

I think this is a pretty stupid holiday. Yes it is about celebrating the love you have in your life. I have plenty of that. I have a very loving family and group of friends. I know that I am loved and cared for, so why should I feel bad about not having a "valentine"?

So to all of my dearest friends and family, I love you.

I wish you all a very happy Valentine's Day.

Tale of Two People

I had a unique childhood. Even though I had siblings, I grew up by myself. Now I don't want you to think that I was neglected by them, or that we were estranged... more that I didn't know my sister, and my brother was more like a cousin.

My brother is my mother's son. For that reason alone... he and I always had a gap between us. He was her golden boy. I love my brother, don't get me wrong. He and I have always had a pretty good relationship, but we were never that close. I really never went to him for advice, and besides the mutual interests we shared, he and I really didn't have a lot in common. We also had a big age gap, so that didn't really help much.

My sister lived with her mom in South Carolina. I never really knew her in any capacity until my teens, and at that point, we also had a pretty narrow relationship. We got along pretty well, but we never spent much time together, so we never got a big chance to let our relationship grow.

So as you can see... I pretty much grew up as an only child. That changed for me when our father separated from my mother. He and my sister began reconciling their relationship, and in that time, I became part of that process. I started to realize what I had... and what I had missed my whole life.

The day I consider the turning point for the Townsend family was April 23, 2005. My sister and father came to see my conference track meet in Austin. I wasn't able to run because of a lingering hamstring injury, and I felt bad, because it was the first and only sporting event my sister ever made it to. But the day was not lost. We had the best time just bonding. Our father told us about the amazing date he went on the night before, and my sister and I thought he was like a high school kid with a crush. (the crush is now his wife and our step mom! she rocks.) We laughed, we talked, we told stories. We wandered around downtown Austin, and ended up in a bar drinking Harps, and sharing tear-filled and touching moments.

Since then... I have found that one of the most amazing people on the planet is my sister. She and I have become incredibly close, and share so many things on so many levels that it is like we did grow up together. Sure we still find out new things about each other, and we are constantly making up for lost time, but for the most part it is like we aren't on our 4 year of being true siblings.

The difference my sister has made on my life is huge. She has guided me into who I am, and without her influence, I would be a different person. She always says "I spent the first 21 years of Zachary's life (Zachary is her brother from another father) and I would spend the next 21 of mine raising you".

Not many people fully realize the impact that a sibling can have on you. After growing up with no true sibling relationship, and finding the best one 4 years ago, I see it. I know what it's like on both sides, and I have to say I prefer what I have now. I love having someone who I can go to any time I need advice, someone to have fun with, and someone who gets me so completely that there is no doubt that we are related.

So to my sister... whom I can never thank you enough for what you have done for me, and for what you are to me. You make me a much better person, and I hope that I have had as much of a profound effect in your life as you do in mine.

Love you sis.

~Ian