For Fucks Sake... What were they thinking?

Ok, so my day didn't start so well. My car failed to start before work. No biggie, change the battery, all is well. I got a ride to work, and had roving watch from 8 to 4. I work nights so the different schedule threw me a little out of whack, but I got over it.

It was a pretty pointless and boring watch, and I figured it was just a whatever kind of day. So I get off watch, and check to see what kind of battery I need. I pop the hood... I can't find the battery. I know I am not mechanically stupid, and I'm no genius at it either, but I usually have no issue finding the battery in a car. So i look and I look, then I remember an episode of Mythbusters where they are working on a Dodge Intrepid, and remember them saying something about removing the tire to get to the battery. So I look near the passenger side tire, and under the air filter and there it was. COMPLETELY FUCKING INACCESSIBLE from above. You have to take off the wheel and remove an access panel to get to the battery. WTF? Pain in the ass.

So me being the genius I am, I didn't really pay attention to the sizes of the bolts, because I figured I could just buy a tool kit and I would be good to go. So I get a ride to get a battery and the place we get the battery has shit for tool kits. The only one they have with anything resembling what I might need was $250 and the salesman said all I would need was a 7/16 and a 5/16 wrench. He said he had replaced one before and it was a piece of cake. So i get the stuff, go back to my car and start trying to work.

I get the car jacked up, the tire off and look at the bolts..... both of the new wrenches I have don't fit. FUCK. So I ask around and find a socket set... that fits the bolts on the mount and battery but not to the access panel. Not only that but the space to actually crank out the bolts is tiny so it takes FOREVER. So I find a pair of vice grips and manage to get the bolts out of the access panel, and wrench it out because it doesn't just pop out... no... you have to finagle and torque and twist... FFS! So I start taking off the top mount bracket, and one of the bolts is just so that when you twist the socket, you touch the battery terminal and gr0und it so you get sparks and shocked. So I shocked myself like 12 times and finally got the bolt out, old battery out, and new battery in, proceeding to shock myself about 12 more times putting the mount bracket back in.

I finally got everything back in and together, and the car starts and runs fine now. After an hour or so of fighting with the stupidest battery set up ever. I was so worn out from the frustration, effort, and ordeal. I really think that some people don't really think out how they design things and some shit isn't supposed to be so fucking difficult. I mean would you want to remove a circuit board to get at your tv remote batteries? Or do you think they should be right under a nice accessible door? People really should think stuff like this out when they design things. Oh well... I hope it will be a long while until i have to deal with that again... and at that point I will be ready!

So how was YOUR day?

~Ian