Friday, January 23, 2009

Public Service Announcement No. 2: What people should NOT wear in public

This is a re-post from on of my very first posts on this site, but I figured this is a perfect subject for a PSA. So here is PSA #2!

What People Should NOT Wear In Public!

Ok Ive been laughing my ass off and shuddering at some of the things I see people wearing these days, so I complied a list of things people should not wear. I broke it down by categories.

FAT PEOPLE:
Not the slightly chubby, or kinda big people, although it could apply, I'm talking "waiting for a heart attack to happen" fat people.

-Spandex. No, never, not even a choice. It's rude and disgusting.

-Tight clothes of any kind. We do not need to see fat rolls accentuated in fabric. It just makes me wanna hurl.

-Anything see through.... *shudder*... that's just wrong.

-Any shorts that come above the knees. Its bad enough we have to see your cankles, but having to see those horrible fat thighs is enough to make me want to gouge my eyes out.

-Anything sleeveless. We do not need to see your fat ass arms. It's really just not attractive at all. You see these fat guys wearing muscle shirts... its kinda stupid... cause the whole point of the shirt is to have... muscles... and not have your fat hanging out of the arm holes.

-Any piece of clothing, that has words proclaiming "sexy, irresistible, or etc" should not be worn. And also the ones that say "Big and beautiful, or Large and in Charge." No. You are none of these so please don't give yourself the appearance of an idiot too.

OLD PEOPLE

Never..... never ever ever ever wear anything tight or with too little fabric. We do not, I repeat do not need to see your old withered body in spandex or in short shorts. Its a crime against humanity. If in doubt, more fabric and more room is always good. I mean c'mon, seriously, you cannot believe people want to see sagging and stuff in places its not supposed to be do you? And... *shudder*... please keep the hemline below the knees. Once again, its bad enough we have to see the veiny calves, but we do not need to see those thunder thighs. Its enough to make me want to pour salt in my eyes.

UGLY PEOPLE

Bag on the head. That's about the only thing that can help you out. Maybe a lot of plastic surgery. But a bag costs like 10 cents and you could make it a fashion statement. "Head Bags by Calvin Klein" or whatever.

MIS-SHAPEN PEOPLE

You know what I'm talking about... they just don't look right. I think the rules that applied to the old and fat people apply here as well. Anything tight or with too little fabric, needs to be sent to Goodwill immediately.


This list is just a friendly reminder to those who shouldn't wear certain things... NOT TO. Please respect the people around you, and don't make them look at your horribly disfigured body. Certain things are made for certain people, and anything that subjects the public to looking at you and seeing things we don't want to see is just plain wrong, and should be punishable by law. So thanks for reading... and have a nice day!

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