Control Freak

I hate not being in control of myself, my feelings, or my actions. It happens very very rarely, but it usually happens all at once.

Usually I am very in control of myself. I know what I am doing, feeling, thinking and can pretty much keep myself in check.

Not today. Today's stress triggers set me off, and I was kinda out of control today. Nothing bad or damaging, just enough to piss me off.

Going back to school, dealing with my everyday hassles, and the thought of driving 50 miles everyday tweaked me today. Also going back to school and dealing with the endless bullshit there pushed me. Then me just being totally stupid today was the final straw.

So anyways I was just a weirdo today... I was up and down, hot and cold, back and forth, and there was simply nothing I could do about it. Outwardly, I'm sure very few people noticed, because I have been hiding my emotions and thought for far too long to not be good at it. I know some people saw it, or were involved in it directly. Very sorry to those who are in that group...

But yeah, I had my one day to be out of control. I had my one day of being a total mental case, but I'm ok now.

Stress is a bitch no?